Confessions of a Struggling Actor

Lunchtime and I'm still feeling the effects of last night...

Not that I was boozing you understand, I only had 3 pints after the show.  It went well and was a culmination of a weekend of stress and hard work.  Friday's rehearsal went well and I was feeling confident - words all there, basic blocking very solid - but then had a couple of blanks on Saturday that really scared me.  Victor the director told me not to worry and to try to relax on Sunday.

So Saturday night I went to a pal's for dinner, where I rediscovered my adoration of dumplings and then round to see Andy (from the theatre) as he's off to India now.  I sat chatting to him for a while and then got chatting to his travelling companion, Jo.  She's very spiritual - talking about inner light and chakras and energies and stuff like that.  We also talked about the London whale, the difference in teaching methods from when we were at school and the importance of fringe theatre.  She then told me that I was very 'powerful and lucky - whoever you come into contact with, you will bring light to them' and told me what a meditation meant that I went through during an impro class at drama college where you went through a clearing and found your 'guide'.  Everyone else had grans, aunties, father, mothers - many tears from everyone but me as I had a cartoon fox!  The teacher didn't explain this to me and he was a cock to me most of the time anyway, but I digress...

Supposedly, the fox symbolises a desire to be individual, to be strong and fend for oneself.  He's cunning (obviously!) and very sexual!  She then told me that she saw me as a seagull!  Imagine my surprise as, being an Aberdonian, I have a deep loathing of those vicious creatures.  She then talked about its strength, its aggression to get what it wants/needs and that both it and the fox (and most animals) just don't care about humans as we share their world and they have to be given respect.  At half 3 in the morning and with several vodkas (bought from Russia itself - oof!) down my neck I thought it would be an idea to get home.

Needless to say I relaxed on Sunday very well.  Watched the manu - liverpool game and didn't consider looking at my script.  Monday was the fit-up (of sorts) and run through (OK, but low energy) and then yesterday was in work at 8am to do my tax return online - what fun - and then off at 2 (no break) to the theatre for final set stuff, a run with props (1st time) and then the show at night.  Much nerves frayed, but the writer and Victor were both blissfully happy with it.

Thank God!

But this is just the start - I have another 11 perfs to go and it has to get better and better.  So long as I have an audience.

Ready to collapse, but have a meeting (how I detest them) at Work.  Oh happy day!